The Hen on the Video Call
My first big video call from the barn went well until a Rhode Island Red walked across the router and joined the committee as a guest expert.
We finally got a decent internet signal in the barn last spring. For years I had been driving into town to sit in the library parking lot and borrow their signal, so a strong bar in my own workshop felt like moving into a mansion. I set up a folding table, a lamp and a laptop and scheduled a call with a regional committee on rural opportunity.
I was proud of the setup. There was a hay bale as a backdrop, a quilt on the wall, and soft light from a window. I looked, if I may say so, like a person who had it all together. The router sat on a shelf behind me, glowing green, and I had given no thought at all to who else had access to that shelf.
Ten minutes in, a chair at the corner of the screen noticed something moving behind my head. I kept talking. A woman on the screen, who ran a program office in Denver, said, 'Mags, I think you have company.' I turned around. A Rhode Island Red hen named Clementine was standing on top of the router with her chest out, looking directly into the camera.
The call, I should explain, was about broadband access. The panel had been trying to make the point that rural families need stronger connections, and here was a hen, standing on the hardware, with a bird's-eye view of the whole matter. She tilted her head. Someone on the committee said, 'Well, she is clearly an expert.' Everyone laughed, and Clementine, who understands laughter, did a small dance.
I let her stay. We carried on for another forty minutes with the hen perched beside my laptop like a co-presenter, and I have never had a panel so attentive. The committee chair thanked her by name in the minutes. I mentioned it afterward to a few folks at farm.FM, and they asked if I could post a transcript. I said Clementine does not release statements. She had said her piece, and the connection never dropped once.